“It’s all about inspiration and showing someone that you can do it”
What has come up for me since I’ve been in Los Angeles, because I am a native Washingtonian from Washington DC, is the fact that I came across the country to Los Angeles to work in the psychotic world of film, television, the arts and music, without having family here, without being wealthy, coming into a place to set up in a very comfortable manner. Since I did that, every time I’ve gone home to DC to visit people, they’re always so amazed by how I was actually able to come out here. And I said. “I actually got on a plane, it was that simple.” But the simple fact that you don’t have any family and you’re looking to be, you know, be successful, whatever that is in your mind, within an arena that is completely competitive, and it’s rigged and a lot of it goes along with what is being consumed. You may not even get to a place where you’re monetarily successful, if you aren’t put into a mainstream position, so folks back home are just like, “you’re crazy.” “How did you do that?”
I just don’t even understand, and for me it’s really interesting that they don’t understand the concept of taking themselves from one city, going into another state, just on the same continent to do work and pursue a dream. The dream for a lot of people is not a reality. I know a lot of people that I love and care for are very content in staying in one city, in one area, without thinking that they could actually pursue their dreams, something outside of corporate structure or a government job
It’s just some type of myth that they see about or that is talked about or they see in movies. It’s really strange when I encounter that. Because I feel you can do whatever you want to do . You don’t have to stay in one position. How does that work? I don’t know because that is not how my mind works.
So it inspired me to keep on going so I could inspire them and inspire their family, and inspire my friends, because it’s all about inspiration and showing someone that you can do it too.
I had a stuffed animal at a later stage of my life, in my late 20s. My mother had given me a stuffed animal that she made. She creates these stuffed animal pillows called Hugs and Kisses, I think. She gave me that stuffed animal. It was a bear and the other piece to it is a heart. Then another one I would sleep with or have on my bed was one that I bought for myself on Valentine’s Day. I have now given that away because that was a time when I was very alone. This was my unhappy Valentine’s Day gift to myself. It was like a security blanket you know, coming out to Los Angeles not being from here or not having any family and not having a partner, a significant other. It was just nice to have this animal that my mother created with her hands right next to me knowing that she’s there, my family is there and everything is all right.